Our generous heart was broken when We watched this:
They say that Hank has never released his birth certificate, his tax returns, and has never responded to allegations of catnip use, there is no record of him serving in any military branch! They say “more facts and fewer fat cats” (by the way, Hank is not fat, this Our privilege to be a fat cat!)
Canines for a Feline Free Tomorrow shamelessly pay for all these horrible insinuations.
Why do humans believe them and even create their own impure fantasies: “Hank is into licking his own genitals! Would you let him date your daughter?”
From the deep of Our heart We tell to the humans: we are cats, we are a culture, not a LOL. According to the habits of our race, the person licking regularly some parts of his body demonstrates his pure thoughts, self-discipline and the will to self-improvement. Sometimes this process of self-perfection gives an inspiration, and the traces of that kind of inspiration one can find in the masterpieces of Monet and Petrov-Vodkin.
As to the catnip, you humans are addicted to the wide choice of herbs, some of herbs you even smoke! Have you ever seen a smoking cat? No way! And more, you humans are drinking alcohol by centiliters, pints, and even liters! By the will of the gods, we cats can only rarely taste a tiny drop of heavenly valerian.
So don’t believe to ignoramuses, listen to your hearts and vote Hank!
Thus speaks Zarathustra, the Cat.